Link Love (27/10/2012)

News Across the World

Bangladesh: “Young campaigners in north Bangladesh are making headway in their battle to end the cycle of poverty caused by early marriage” Bangladeshi girls call in ‘wedding busters’ to tackle child marriage – Guardian

Bosnia: Europe’s first hijab-wearing mayor to take office in Bosnia – AFP

India: “Tired of unsafe and slow public transportation, girls in Kashmir are getting their own wheels. Scootys, an Indian-manufactured motorized two-wheeler, is marketed directly to girls. As a result, sales are on the rise. Local banks have even introduced financing plans to help girls buy scooters. Girls say commuting and helping their families with errands has never been easier or more fun.” Girls Seize Independence With Scooters in Kashmir – Global Press Institute

Indonesia: Depok rape victim ‘expelled’ from school – The Jakarta Post & Depok School Reverses Decision to Expel 14-Year-Old Rape Victime – The Jakarta Globe

Malaysia: Seeking the Right to Be Female in Malaysia – NY Times & Malaysia transsexuals lose cross-dressing court case – BBC

Saudi Arabia: Saudi women to be granted license to practice law – Al Arabiya

Thought-provoking

“The question is: Are we satisfied with just feeling like we are doing something, or do we really want to do something? I’d rather take my money and send it right to the labs. Processed meats, plastics of most kinds, including bottled waters, most makeup and personal care products, any food product with pesticides among many others have no business going pink.” Buying Pink Ribbon Products Might Make You Feel Good, But It’s Not Helping People With Breast Cancer – Role / Reboot

“I don’t remember what happened after that, but the frustration that arose within me was a hundred times larger than my size. I knew what was right, and I could not be tricked. I did not feel this babysitter was “doing what’s best” which I could sometimes sense from adults—I felt, quite frankly, that she was being cruel.” Things I Would Never Do to Children – Fatal Feminist

“But everyone has substances or behaviors in their lives – whether obsessive internet social media stuff or green tea lattes or shopping — that take you away from your sober, clear minded, autonomous self, that take you away from bright joy and frm creating what you really want to create while you are here on earth.
I want to invite you to set healthy boundaries around those things. I want you to ask yourself,What would I do differently in relation to that substance, if I was making a grand embrace of myself and the life I want to lead?My Sugar Story – Tara Sophia Mohr

“Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse in which false information is presented with the intent of making a victim doubt his or her own memory and perception. It may simply be the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred, or it could be the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorienting the victim” Gaslighting or Pure Bastardry? – From a Whisper to a Roar

“Breast Cancer Is Not A Pink Ribbon” – Unladylike Musings

“Safewords are a thing. You don’t have to be having kinky sex to enjoy the premise behind a safeword: the idea that any participant can stop the action at any time for any reason. Clarisse recommends (and I agree!) using a Red, Yellow, Green approach. Red for “halt immediately, let’s process these feelings,” yellow for “approaching my limits” and green for “FUCK YES!” She talks so much more about safewords and you should read about them because this is something everyone can adopt from the kink community, regardless of what kinds of things you’re doing in bed.” 20 Things You Can Take Away From “The S and M Feminist” Whether Youøre Into S and M or Not – Autostraddle

“I’m going to give a piece of advice for getting more work done and actually achieving all those goals you claim to have, but haven’t made much progress on yet. But it’s also a piece of advice I’m guessing most people will ignore, even though it wouldn’t be too hard to implement. Here it is: Only have one goal at a time.” Why Focus (not Effort) is the Key to Getting Stuff Done – Scott H Young

Religion

“But looking at those folks in good marriages/intimate relationships, I did wonder more than once: How does all this religious guilt that I have internalized make theological sense? Unless we believe in a god that enjoys needlessly torturing and abusing his creation, why should my allowing myself to be degraded and miserable be pleasing to God? Surely, it should be the reverse? If we can look at an eagle and say that God made it to fly, or at a rose and say that God made it to bloom, why can’t we look at women and say that God made them to live up to their potentials for fulfillment, joy, love and happiness?” How to leave an abusive marriage – A Sober Second Look

Charlie Fuqua says Death Penalty an Option for Rebellious Children – No Longer Quivering

“Fr Michael Fitzgerald of the Church of Our Lady Conceived Without Sin in Mitchelstown doesn’t seem to think so. Last week, he “arranged for a woman to give a graphic account of her abortion at a children’s Mass and outline how she believed her special needs child was a punishment from God“.” Pulpit Politics – Gaelick

Equality

International Day of the Girl 2012: Devastating images show the terrifying world of child brides – Daily Mail

“I had grown up constantly wavering between denying and suspecting that my skin color was behind the fights picked with me, the insults, the casual distance kept up even between myself and some of my closest friends. Sometimes—in retrospect: oftentimes—these incidents were obviously rooted in race. I have been called “chink” and “flat face” and “monkey” many many times. And it is the context of these words that make a child grow uncomfortable with who he is, that instill a deep fear in him.” How the Rules of Racism Are Different for Asian Americans – The Good Men Project

Trans Health Forum – Feminist Ire

“But we really need to make an effort to get in the picture. Our sons need to see how young and beautiful and human their mamas were. Our daughters need to see us vulnerable and open and just being ourselves — women, mamas, people living lives. Avoiding the camera because we don’t like to see our own pictures? How can that be okay?” Allison Tate: The Mom Stays in the Picture – Huffington Post

“We must also be more intentional about recognizing unconscious stereotypes. People who score high in cognitive bias on online tests measuring implicit associations — the tendency to pair negative words with black people more quickly than with white people, for example — often express anger, shame and denial at the findings, particularly when they are 180 degrees at odds with their stated beliefs. (This author was shocked to discover an unconscious bias favoring old people, despite a lifetime of working with children and young adults!) Unfortunately, these defensive emotions are unlikely to rise to the surface, making it hard to learn from the findings.” Why Are Women Biased Against Other Women – Time

 

This. Whole. Thing. “Don’t go out and get drunk, it could lead to you getting raped. Also, don’t have sex with someone because it could get you raped by someone they know. Don’t be young, that could definitely get you raped. While we’re at it, especially don’t be a child, that could really get you raped…” Don’t Get Raped – Blue Milk

Health

Are There Dangers Lurking in Your Toothpaste? – Cavegirl Skincare

Vegetable Stock from Scratch – These Light Footsteps

Is Modern Wheat Unhealthy? – Mark’s Daily Apple

Warm Raw Chocolate Hemp Chia Porridge – Domestic Diva

Beauty & Body Image

“There’s no question that “looks privilege” remains more influential in women’s lives than in men’s. Youth and beauty have an unfair determinative power in women’s lives than they do in men’s; the rise in male vanity and body anxiety hasn’t yet brought full parity. At the same time, the reality is that good-looking men and women alike enjoy known and demonstrable advantages in everything from dating to hiring. If we’re willing—as most reasonable people are—to acknowledge how our race, class, and sex give us unmerited advantages, it’s untenable for those of us who enjoy the unearned genetic bonus of good bone structure to pretend that our appearance has nothing whatsoever to do with our success.” How Much Do Good Looks Help People In Our Culture? – Role / Reboot

Bottom Heavy Breasts – Braless in Brasil

Not only is looksism even more amorphous than plenty of other “isms,” but think of how you sound if you talk about it openly: It can seem hopelessly narcissistic to own up to one’s “beauty privilege,” and hopelessly affirmation-seeking to talk about suffering at the hands of looksism. Unlike privilege that comes from being white, able-bodied, male, thin—and even, to a lesser degree, being heterosexual or middle class—beauty privilege is something that’s both physically evident and seemingly impossible to deconstruct from a personal point of view, which is a key way that privilege (and lack thereof) comes to be understood and taken seriously.” Beauty Privilege: Can We Talk? – The Beheld

“The mixed messages about grooming don’t stop there. Although we should want to groom our hair and do our makeup just so, we shouldn’t spend too much time doing it. There’s actually research that shows that women who spend “too much time” on grooming actually earn less than their speedier counterparts. Read about it here and here. Researchers attribute this to prejudices against “overly groomed” women. So, you need to try hard, but not too hard. And make it snappy.” Your Hair and Makeup Could “Sabotage” Your Career. Really? – Adios Barbie

Inspirational

“We are all works in progress, moving along the trajectory of our lives learning from our mistakes and distilling our preferences as we go. And yet, at every point in that process, we are a person who is: whole, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful, and worthy of a wonderful life.
You are worthy of a beautiful life. Today. Right now.” Grounding Yourself in Self-Love – Mara Glatzel

Wearing color and practicing positive self-talk can help body blues – Already Pretty

Professional

Bullish: Maybe Work-Life Balance Means You Should Work More – The Gloss

Saying Sorry at Work Hurts Women’s Careers – The Grindstone

Misc.

A Custom Fit: Container Gardening – Autostraddle

7 Ways to Use Herbs to Freshen Your House – Care2

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