Link Love (2013-04-27)

Thought-provoking

“The first problem is if you don’t trust yourself. That’s an important area to work with.
Your relationship with yourself is like your relationship with anyone else. If you have a friend who is constantly late and breaking his word, not showing up when he says he will, eventually you’ll stop trusting that friend. It’s like that with yourself, too. It’s hard to like someone you don’t trust, and it’s hard to like yourself if you don’t trust yourself.” A Guide to Practical Contentment – Zen Habits

“All communication styles can be abused by people who use them in bad faith, and it is good to consider others’ feelings and the consequences of your words before opening your mouth. But for over-thinkers, we tend to want to manage every part of every interaction and other people’s feelings about that interaction. By far the most common question I get is. “Person is violating my boundaries in the following terrible ways. How do I get them to stop without hurting their feelings?” And the answer is: You ask them to stop, and you let their feelings be their own. The flip side of this question is “How do I ask someone out in a way that guarantees that they will be happy about it and won’t reject me and things will never get awkward?” Again, the answer is: You ask them out, and you let their reactions to that be their own. Other people’s feelings are important, but they are not the total boss of you. To be so self-effacing that you think that asking people to stop interrupting you, or to stop crawling all over you at parties, or to hang out sometime constitutes you doing them some kind of emotional violence is a kind of egotism – you are giving yourself WAY too much power to control the future and other people.” #468 and #469: “Hey, knock it off”, or, Constructive Conflict, Continued – Captain Awkward

How to Build Intimacy in Any Relationship – Think Simple Now

Equality

“In the end, people are going to continue to be angry about this piece. We’ll continue to call Dutton selfish (leaving her husband entirely out of the equation), and we’ll make sure to include the word “woman” as often as we can in our criticisms of her. Somewhere, though, I hope we can find the sensibility and the bravery to confront the fear and anxiety that gets triggered when women speak their truths.” I’m Grateful to the Woman Who Says She Regretted Having Kids – Role / Reboot

“The LGBT movement was never meant to be one person’s identity. Every relationship form and desire other than monogamous heterosexuality is, to one extent or another, marginalised in our society. And we are all minorities- individually, at least. We are an umbrella. We join with each other to provide solidarity, safety and community. To create a space where the norm is to be, yes, something other than cis, straight and mono.” We Are Not Your Afterthought: responding to LGBT Soup – Consider the Tea Cosy

The 4 Rules of Sexual Consent – Role / Reboot

“But it is fair to say that the research shows no significant disadvantage associated with being raised by lesbian mothers or gay fathers — not in academic performance, not in psychological health, not in social or sexual development, not in violent behavior or substance abuse. And the research leaves little doubt that stable, two-parent households (of whatever flavor) are likely to be better off financially, more attentive to the upbringing of children and more secure than single-parent households.” About the Children – NY Times

Judge Finally Rules the Morning After Pill Should Be Available to Everyone – Care2

“The record on Thatcher and feminism, therefore, could not be clearer . Despite her pioneering leadership in the male-dominated world of politics, she did nothing to improve the lives of women . In fact she espoused the very ideology and values that entrenched disadvantage for women and a host of other historically marginalised people.” Iron Lady was a self-serving anti-feminist – Welcome to the IFN

Health

If there was only one yoga exercise… – Yoga for Endometriosis & Pelvic Pain

“When people find out I study milk, they automatically think we already know about it, or it’s not important. And I’m like, ‘No, we don’t know about it, and it’s super important.’” The science of breast milk: Latest research on nursing and milk vs. formula – Slate

Why Won’t Doctors Treat My Problem Period? – xoJane

“A recent study by two Michigan hospitals found that they treated almost twice as many heart attack victims on the first day of Daylight Saving than on a typical Sunday. And if past behavior holds true, there will be a bump in traffic accidents on Monday because, as researchers have suggested, more people take “microsleeps” that day, due to the disruption of their body clocks.” Lousy Sleep Isn’t Good for Your Body, Either – Innovations

Recipes

Borscht – Chris Kresser

Paleo Banana Bread Chocolate Truffles – Civilized Caveman Cooking Creations

Beauty & Body Image

The History of the Flapper, Part 5: Who Was Behind the Fashions? – Threaded

“We need to figure out how to give ourselves, and all women, a strong sense of identity that has nothing to do with our physical appearance. We must embrace the idea that all of us can be sexual and serious. One does not preclude the other.” Jennifer Armstrong: Revisiting ‘The Beauty Myth ‘ – Huffington Post

Inspirational

“Many people who think of themselves as having low self-esteem don’t have chronically low self-esteem, their self-esteem is better described as fluctuating. They feel good when they’re having success and feel terrible when they’re not getting the response they desire from the world.” 4 Success Tips for People With Fluctuating Self-Esteem – Psychology Today

1 Comment

  1. LK

    Ok you know I’m not huge on having kids but there is NO WAY I could ever be like this woman Ms. Dutton. Not only did she not want kids but there may actually be something wrong with her. Mentally wrong. Its ok to not bond directly but you don’t just forget your kid and not care. Or not care that your baby may die, whether you wanted them or not. I wouldn’t be surprised to find out that she had been clinically depressed during this time. It also doesn’t help that she felt she needed to do everything the traditional American way: pop them out at 22, never have a career, never develop a sense of self. That is where her problem lies. She let society dictate her choices. I don’t think it had that much to do with having the children.

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