Link Love (2015-03-07)


The FBI’s Top Hostage Negotiator Teaches You How to Lower Your Bills – Barking Up the Wrong Tree

“Expected Value, or EV, is the fundamental building block of decision-making. If you don’t understand it, whether by name or not, you are not making optimal decisions. If you do understand it, at least you stand a chance.” EV (How to Make All Decisions) – Tynan

How to Introduce Kink Into Your Relationship – Dr NerdLove

“In fact, rather than all this spending helping our kids, we could be causing problems. Dan Kindlon, a research psychologist at Harvard University, says that if we give our kids too much too early in life, they’ll never be satisfied with anything. We’re not teaching them the value of earnings things, waiting for them, or trying to prioritise what they want most: we’re teaching them that they’ll always get what they want.
By never refusing on the grounds of expense, we are also showing children that when they are older they can buy whatever they like, whenever they want, and so we’re teaching them to overspend.” Why you must stop spoiling your kids – AOL Money

#655: Visits With Highly Difficult People – Captain Awkward

“I’m done being the asshole who’s bitching about the messes. It matters. Yes, it matters, to clean up after one’s self, to treat your belongings with respect, to contribute to the house in a way that teaches you to be a decent human and member of the home, and community, and earth. WORK, matters.
But I’m done using every fucking spare moment to straighten, clean, pay, arrange, organize, text, email, accomplish necessary tasks. I’m done using every spare moment “engaged in a productive activity.” I’m done looking around this house and seeing only and all that’s wrong. When did I make that “my role?”
I’m fucking done.” There’s a deer hide in my garage, and I’m done caring – renegade mothering


“A Loving Deed Is An Equation With Three Components.
1. Intention.
The person initiating has some intention in mind to be loving. The act is conceived in that person’s mind and the idea of how to do it is formulated. The person thinks, “Roses!” and heads into a florist’s shop.
2. Action.
The act is actually performed. The roses are given to the person who is supposed to get them.
3. Response.
The person getting the roses responds to the action somehow–hopefully with approval and a big smile.
The problem is that a huge number of Christians have cut off the last part of the equation.” Reconnecting the Disconnect – Ex-Communications

“Mother Teresa wasn’t so very saintly, a new study reports.
Canadian academics trawled through 96 per cent of all originally researched literature on the Catholic icon and concluded that her reputation as one of the holiest women of the twentieth century was the product of hype.
Researchers allege missing funds for humanitarian work and homes for the poor that did not offer the medical care they required, leaving many to die.
Serge Larivée, a researcher from the University of Montreal, said: “Given the parsimonious management of Mother Theresa’s works, one may ask where the millions of dollars for the poorest of the poor have gone?”” Academics suggest Hitch called it right on Mother Teresa – Independent

“What irks me is this tendency to waffle and wiggle every time someone holds the Christian faith accountable for the claims that it makes.  We’re not making this stuff up, and we’re not misrepresenting the religion’s claims.  We’re going straight to the sources (ad fontes, h/t Erasmus) and we’re judging the religion based on what we find there.  For this we are repeatedly told, “You’re doing it wrong” even though we’re just evaluating the faith on its own terms.  Over time this religion is becoming increasingly preoccupied with making excuses for why the things it has claimed never seem to turn out the way it said they would.” The No True Prayer Fallacy – Godless in Dixie


Child, Bride, Mother – NY Times

“Clearly, the most important thing about any woman is how she looks and how she traps those men. And clearly it’s surprising that a fat lady might be smart and nice. (That “nevertheless”!)
On Twitter, ABC journalist Joanna McCarthy named the introduction “the worst opening lines of an obituary,” and others compared the paper’s coverage of McCullough’s life to its laudatory treatment of Bryce Courtenay — who, like McCullough, was an Australian author but, unlike McCullough, was a man.” Australian paper: Rest in peace and sexism, Colleen McCullough – Feministing

5 Alternatives to Taking Your Spouse’s Last Name – Everyday Feminism

“According to one study cited in an eye-opening piece by the New York Times’ Claire Cain Miller last year, a mother’s future earnings increased an average of 7% for every month of leave the father took.
Yet the article also reported that paternity leave at U.S. companies is on the decline, with the share of companies offering it dropping by 5 percentage points from 2010 to 2014. And while 89% of all fathers took some time off after their children’s births, most of them took a week or less.
What gives? Some of the decline can be blamed on a powerful stigma that persists surrounding fathers who take time off. Cain Miller wrote about a San Francisco lawyer whose firm offered four weeks of paid leave to fathers—but when he took it, his partners questioned his commitment.” Want to create more women leaders? Offer paternity leave – Fortune

Beauty & Body Image

“African Americans who dressed in fine wears were accused of not “knowing their place,” thinking they were equal to middle-class whites and better than working-class whites. The punishment for such an “offense” was often a beating, or even murder. The vigilantes who brutally murdered 14-year-old Emmett Till in 1955 for allegedly whistling at a white woman also stripped him of his stylish suit, and they tied his naked body to a cotton gin fan with barbed wire. With all of the contestations over the dressed black body, it makes sense that protesters would use dress as a central element of their activism.” ‘Selma’ Costumes Reveal Class and Consciousness of the Movement – The Root

New York City blizzard: How the Great Blizzard of 1888 killed the petticoat – Slate


“According to a growing number of scientists, this is exactly how we should be thinking about the condition. George Slavich, a clinical psychologist at the University of California in Los Angeles, has spent years studying depression, and has come to the conclusion that it has as much to do with the body as the mind. “I don’t even talk about it as a psychiatric condition any more,” he says. “It does involve psychology, but it also involves equal parts of biology and physical health.”
The basis of this new view is blindingly obvious once it is pointed out: everyone feels miserable when they are ill. That feeling of being too tired, bored and fed up to move off the sofa and get on with life is known among psychologists as sickness behaviour. It happens for a good reason, helping us avoid doing more damage or spreading an infection any further.
It also looks a lot like depression. So if people with depression show classic sickness behaviour and sick people feel a lot like people with depression – might there be a common cause that accounts for both?
The answer to that seems to be yes, and the best candidate so far is inflammation – a part of the immune system that acts as a burglar alarm to close wounds and call other parts of the immune system into action. A family of proteins called cytokines sets off inflammation in the body, and switches the brain into sickness mode.” Is depression a kind of allergic reaction? – The Guardian

Pills or Paleo? Preventing and Reversing Autoimmune Disease – Chris Kresser

AIP Food Storage Basics – Autoimmune Paleo

The Link Between Sleep and Your Weight – The Paleo Mom

Corn Flakes & Cortisol: Cereal for Breakfast? – Wellness Mama

How Do We Grow to Like the Foods We Once Hated? – NPR

Pills or Paleo? Preventing and Reversing Acne and Other Skin Problems – Chris Kresser

Bone Broth Benefits for Digestion, Arthritis, and Cellulite- Dr Axe

Top 20 Health Benefits of Gelatin: Helps prevent Arthritis, cellulite, stretch marks, wrinkles, brittle bones and more – Grass Fed Girl

Hand skin is the foundation – Katy Says

Got Junk In Your Trunk? It May Be a Good Thing – Bulletproof


Raspberry Valentine Cake – Autoimmune Paleo

Roast Pork with Onion Apple Gravy – Phoenix Helix

Cinnamon Glazed Pumpkin Spice Cookies (AIP/Paleo) – It’s me, Charlotte!

Autoimmune Paleo Savory Breakfast Cookies (aka flattened biscuits) – The Curious Coconut

Banana Loaf (AIP, Paleo) – The Paleo Partridge

Preserving Fresh Basil – Redhead Can Decorate

AIP Pita Bread – Grazed and Enthused

Apple Spice Breakfast Patties – Adventures in Partaking

How to Make Apple Cider Vinegar – The Prairie Homestead

Awesome AIP Mayo – The Primordial Table

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