Link Love (2015-07-07)


“Let’s start with resources. Resources are not endless. Rescues exist solely because of their supporters. Decisions must be made on how to spend resources. Should you save 20 dogs with great temperaments with the time and money that you have or should you use that same time and money to save one “misunderstood” dog that mauled a child or killed another dog (in circumstances that are not extenuating)? The decision may be very clear to those with common sense. But the decision to focus on dogs with reasonably good temperaments gets questioned and condemned by so many “armchair rescuers” (see here for that explanation). Said armchair rescuers talk endlessly of “rehabilitation” and “every dog can bite” yet offer no actual options other than “help him or her”.” Can (and Should) Every Dog Be Saved – Victoria Stilwell – Positively

Esther Perel: Rethinking infidelity … a talk for anyone who has ever loved – TED

“Of all the properties that objects appear to have,” Chirimuuta writes, “color hovers uneasily between the subjective world of sensation and the objective world of fact.” The Philosophy of Color Perception – The New Republic

Build Love Maps – The Gottman Relationship Blog

“The idea is simple: treat your potential sex-partners with respect. One of the mistakes that many, many men make is that they assume that a woman who’s interested in sex is somehow ok with being treated like a sex object rather than a person. Someone who’s interested in getting down, either in the abstract or with you in particular, hasn’t miraculously given up her self-esteem. Treating her like a sure thing or that the only thing that she has to offer you is her vagina is a great way to ensure that sex will not happen – either that night or any time in the future. Whether you’ve both swiped right on Tinder, she’s checked the “casual sex” box on OKCupid or she’s generally indicated that she’s down to clown, treating her with genuine respect and an interest in her pleasure for pleasure’s sake can be the difference as to whether you’re going back to your place alone or together.” The Truth About Casual Sex (and How to Get It) – Dr NerdLove

Ten Ways to Be an Inspiring Leader – Wise Talk


“I’m going to list a few things that are awesome about a post-Christian life. None of these are why I deconverted. NONE, let me repeat! NONE NONE NONE! If I’d thought Christianity was true, then I’d have swallowed my distaste and continued despite the serious costs. What I’m about to describe are not reasons I left, but rather awesome perks now that I’ve left religion behind. I didn’t even realize fully just how awful it was to be a Christian till I got over that indoctrination. What follows here happens more in the conservative branches of Christianity than the mainstream, but I see traces of these elements in even the “nicest” branches of the religion.” Your New Life Awaits – Ex-Communications

You call for a ‘double revolution’. What do you mean by that?
What happened in Tunisia in 2010 was a political revolution driven by recognition that the state was oppressing everybody. But I think when women looked around afterwards, they recognised that the state, the street and the home still oppressed women specifically and that trifecta of oppression means that political revolution, unless accompanied by a social and sexual revolution, will fail.” Mona Eltahawy: ‘All Religions Are Obsessed With My Vagina’ – The Guardian

“Here’s what troubles me: these Christians demonstrate a profound (and dangerous!) confusion about the differences between forgiveness vs. reconciliation and forgiveness vs. accepting the reality of consequences. And THAT confusion is symptomatic of an entire system that enables abuse.” It’s Not Only About Josh Duggar, It’s Also About an Entire SYSTEM of Abuse – Elizabeth Esther


What to Do When Your Child Wants to Dress in a Gender Non-Conforming Way: 5 Alternatives to Forcing Gender Normativity on Children – Everyday Feminism

“We need to stop celebrating motherhood, as though it is a universally good and beautiful thing, and instead start celebrating good mothering practices and educating people about bad ones. We need to stop acting as though mothers are worthy of praise just because they’re mothers. There’s often this perception that people who choose not to have children are selfish while mothers are selfless, but this isn’t just simplistic, it’s wrong. There are plenty of people who have children for selfish reasons, using their children for their own self-gratification. Motherhood is not inherently selfless.” Motherhood is Not Inherently Deserving of Praise – Love, Joy, Feminism

Frustrated with Hearing “I’m Not a Feminist Since I Don’t Hate Men”? Here’s 7 Ways to Show Why Those Claims Are Sexist – Everyday Feminism

“Rape culture is a contract we never actually signed. It’s a contract that says Hey, sure, you can totally say and do anything you want to my body — you deserve it! The contract is signed for us before we are born, and it’s waved in our faces throughout our lives.
There are a lot of bylaws in this contract. Like Section I, Article 3: Do I Look Fat in This? Or Section VIII, Article 7: Your Biological Clock is Ticking and You Need To Get Knocked Up. Or Section I, Article 9: Come On, Get My Dick Wet.” Rape Culture Is a Contract We Never Actually Signed – Feministing

Beauty & Body Image

“And in the end, it all comes down to love. Food can make us feel things, things we may even mistake for love. But we make a mistake when we fundamentally change our relationship about food and rely on it as our source of comfort.
Food will never comfort you. Food says nothing about how smart you are or driven or intelligent or beautiful. Food doesn’t understand you. Food is only food. It feeds the body, it serves a purpose, but we cannot turn to it for support.” Am I Overweight, Fat or Undesirable? – Health Light Balance

9 Cardinal Sins of iPhoneography – Enlight Blog


What your level of sensitivity say about you – Salon

“I can go to this yoga class—force myself into these clothes, drive to the studio, roll the mat out, push my way through the poses and fight each step of the way. Or I can stay home and rest. This last thought was a surprise. One that came from a soft, gentle voice in my head, not the workhorse megaphone that usually forces me to power through. I stop to consider them both, and for the first time accept the stillness that my body and mind crave.
To feel good about this decision, I make a deal with myself—I’m not going to just zone out. If I’m not going to practice yoga on my mat, then I am going to practice it with every move I make at home, finding the beauty in the rest, being mindful with each movement, observing everything.
So I open my eyes and watch it all.” I Skipped Yoga Class and This Is What Happened – Elephant Journal

Calming Breathwork to Relax Your Body – Charlie GlickmanPhD – Make Sex Easy

Chronic Illness & Pain

4 Techniques to Help With Physical Pain – Psychology Today

“Since many people with celiac disease continue to feel sick, even when they eliminate gluten from their diet, scientists have been looking for the reason why. One theory is cross-reactivity. What does that mean? When your body develops an allergy to gluten, it creates antibodies that remember gluten’s protein structure. If you eat gluten, those antibodies set off an inflammatory response. Some other foods have similar protein structures to gluten, and you may react to those as if they were gluten. It’s basically a case of mistaken identify. It’s important to note, however, that cross-reactivity isn’t something that happens to everyone. And very few people cross-react to all of the potential foods. It’s simply something to explore when giving up gluten isn’t enough.” What Is Gluten Cross-Reactivity? – Autoimmune Paleo

10 Tips For Travelling on the AIP – Paleo Cajun Lady

“Many times when you are chronically ill there are things you want to do but because of symptoms they can be difficult. This is more so for people that have suddenly became ill and had full and busy lives before they became sick. The sudden reduction in physical activity can leave someone with a chronic illness to have feelings of guilt and feeling as if they are a burden to others. Also, many people with chronic illnesses have a people pleasing trait and have a hard time saying “No” which can sometimes leave the person with the illness physically and emotionally drained. So what do you do when the mind says yes but the body says no? Here are some tips!” When the Mind Says Yes, But the Body Says No – Fibro TV

11 Totally Natural and Completely Unexpected Ways to Ease Pain – Huffington Post

“The importance of self care has really come to the forefront in recent years, and what self care as a concept means to people can be very personal. For some, the best thing they can do to keep themselves happy is the indulgence of a massive bar of chocolate, duvet and all their favourite films, while for others it’s diligently picking the right foods and getting out for some therapeutic exercise. Often it can be a combination of approaches, and being able to identify what’s best for you at that moment is one of the key principles involved in looking after yourself.” Guest Post: Meditation and Self Care: Where to Begin – The Pillow Fort

Healthy Tricks, Treats or Treatments – Rebuilding Wellness


How We’re Setting Our Kids Up to Be Fat, Sick and Unhealthy – Mark’s Daily Apple

“As the ketogenic diet gains popularity, it’s important to have a balanced discussion regarding the merits of this diet. Let me emphasize right out of the gate that this is not a diet without merits (excuse the double negative); in fact, it has significant therapeutic potential for some clinical pathologies. However, it is also a diet with inherent risk, as evidenced by the extensive list of adverse reactions reported in the scientific literature—and this has not yet been a thorough enough part of the public discussion on ketogenic diets.” Adverse Reactions to Ketogenic Diets: Caution Advised – The Paleo Mom

Secrets to a Good Night’s Sleep: Advanced Tips – Part 2 – Whole9

“Permaculture is a sustainable approach to designing natural resource systems.
Like gardens.
But permaculture principles can also be applied to biological systems (like humans) and social systems (like families and organizations).” Permaculture for People – Petra8Paleo

7 Tips for Eating Healthy When You’re Super Busy – Coconuts & Kettlebells

“The relationship between women and testosterone is poorly understood.
Testosterone is commonly blamed for libido problems… but that’s all anyone ever really talks about.
There is however a lot more to testosterone than meets the eye! Sufficient testosterone is important for mood, for energy, for cognitive function, and for overall health. Without testosterone, your energy and happiness can really suffer. How to know if you have low testosterone?” How to Know if You Have Low Testosterone – Paleo for Women

You’re Sitting on Your Toilet Wrong – Medium


Primal Mocktails – Mark’s Daily Apple

Bacon & Guacamole Fat Bombs – The KetoDiet Blog

Victorious Offal Muffins: the Uncured Remix (AIP & Low-FODMAP) – Petra8Paleo

Coconut Milk Kefir – Wellness Mama

‘Eat a Rainbow’ Beetroot, Carrot and Herb Salad – Joanna Frankham

Grain-Free Blueberry Muffins – Maria Rickert Hong

Paleo AIP Peach Ginger Ice Cream – Phoenix Helix

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