Link Love (2016-04-09)
“Marvel’s Jessica Jones is an excellent example of what is possible with both long-form storytelling and the superhero genre. Getting beyond the standard “Let’s you and him fight” narrative of so many stories of people with powers, Jessica Jones focuses on the emotional journey of its characters as Jessica and the others try to come to terms with the trauma in their pasts. The brutal fights and action hero moments are all there, to be sure, but the meat of the story focuses on relationships and healing; on what it means to be a victim and what it means to be a survivor.” What Can We Learn From Jessica Jones? – Dr NerdLove
Slightly fewer Americans are reading print books, new survey finds – Pew Research Center
“So, yes, I’d like a bigger government. One that runs its programs well, with public buy-in. In the U.S., a lot of our public services kind of suck, because they are understood as being only for the poor. In Europe, public services are actually for the public. As in everyone. I’m pretty sure we could do a better job with our health care and libraries and free clinics if they were understood as belonging to us all, not as some cheap handout to people on the margins. And certainly, many localities and states do a very fine job with these things. I would trust Massachusetts with my life. But it should not be the case in one of the richest countries in the world that crossing state borders is the difference between life and death, or a public school education that gives your kids a chance and one that doesn’t.” Why More Socialism Would Help 51% of the Population Create More Jobs – Get Bullish
“Obviously, nothing shows people that murderous religious fanaticism is bad like more murderous religious fanaticism, and nothing says “powerful” like a deity that has to rely on mortals to do His dirty work for Him.” Conservative Wants to “Bomb Mecca Off the Face of the Earth” to Show Christian Love – Friendly Atheist
How Sexism in the Church Almost Ruined My Life – Jezebel
“They didn’t attend school, either; home schooling mostly consisted of Serene reading to the younger children. When the older kids watched a school bus drive past on a country road and asked why they couldn’t go, they were met with various excuses. So Isaiah and Alfred worked with Sam in his house-painting business or labored in Nancy Campbell’s immense vegetable garden while CeCe, Kula, and Cherish cleaned, cooked, and tended to a growing brood of young ones. It was also the job of the “African kids,” as they called themselves, to keep a reservoir filled with water from the creek. CeCe hadn’t yet learned to read when Serene gave her a book on midwifery so she could learn to deliver their future babies. “They treated us pretty much like slaves,” she said. It’s a provocative accusation, but one that Kula and Isaiah—as well as two neighbors and a children’s welfare worker—all repeated.
Discipline included being hit with rubber hosing or something resembling a riding crop if the children disrespected Serene, rejected her meals, or failed to fill the reservoir. For other infractions, they were made to sleep on the porch without blankets. Engedi, the toddler, was disciplined for her attachment to CeCe. To encourage her bond with Serene, the Allisons would place the child on the floor between them and CeCe and call her. If Engedi went to CeCe instead, the children recalled, the Allisons would spank her until she wet herself.” Orphan Fever: The Evangelical Movement’s Adoption Obsession – Mother Jones
29 of Bill Cosby’s Accusers Met to Discuss Sexual Assault on Dateline – Jezebel
“Sometimes it feels that history repeats itself and only the names change. This is certainly the case with the current refugee crisis which parallels many previous refugee crises and migrant waves. People fleeing war and poverty in the search of a better life is not a new occurrence, in fact you could say it’s an eternal issue. Other writers have drawn attention to how current attitudes to Muslims resemble that towards Jews in the 30s and 40s (the family of Anne Frank applied for refugee status but were rejected). I can also see a strong resemblance between Muslims and my own people, the Irish.” Muslims Are The New Irish – Whistling in the Wind
A Letter to Meryl Streep: Why Not Call Yourself a Feminist? – Role / Reboot
“Erin Gloria Ryan defines a Nice Guy as:
“[T]he sort of Guy who has declared himself to be Nice, and thus deserving of positive (usually sexual) attention from the female of his choice, upon whom he has often projected an elaborate fantasy of perfection and willingness that rarely has anything to do with the subject’s actual feelings or desires. When a Nice Guy is romantically rejected by a woman he wants, he lashes out at her, wondering why [she] won’t go out with him. After all, he has been Nice!”
A lot has been said about entitlement at play here—to believe that doing certain actions means you deserve a particular response regardless of other factors is obviously not okay, but it’s a common sentiment expressed by men who want women, and it’s historically been validated by social custom and media. After all, how many men in romantic comedies “fall in love” with women they barely know, do grand romantic gestures that are borderline stalker-y at best, then end up with the object of their affection regardless of some preexisting monogamous relationship she has? While we may balk at the implication that because Jessica does not return Kilgrave’s affections, she deserves to die, there’s a whole Tumblr (content warning) that compiles stories of women violently attacked for saying no.” Toxic Masculinity in Jessica Jones: Kilgrave as a “Nice Guy” and Will Simpson as Misogynistic Hero – The Mary Sue
In this school, children will grow up believing bathrooms have no gender – Quartz
“I think we’re told that if our love doesn’t look like the end of a Meg Ryan movie, all the time, even 7 years into it, there’s something wrong with our relationship, when actually nobody’s love looks like that. So in other words, YES, there is in fact something wrong with it.
There is always something wrong with it. The point is to get okay with the shit that’s wrong, or leave. We spend so much time trying to “fix” what’s wrong. What about asking ourselves “Can I live with what’s wrong?” And if the answer is “no,” then I guess we work like hell to get better, or we leave.
But often, I’ve found, the answer is “yes.” I can live with that. It’s not perfect, but it’s okay. It’s not a deal-breaker.” “Can two people be in love forever?” – Renegade Mothering
“The biggest takeaway for me? Even if you spank with control, discipline, and good intent, your kids are more likely to have depression and engage in aggressive behavior in adulthood.” The science of spanking: What happens to spanked kids when they grow up? – Upworthy
“Your partner could be a total sweetheart with no history of controlling or violent behavior and also be General Goodperson of Gun Mountain, Olympic Gold Medalist in Gun Stuff, Annie Oakley Award Recipient For Neat-o Gun Tricks, Sworn To Only Eat What They Personally Kill and there should still be no guns in your shared house, ever. Constitutional rights, state and local ordinances be damned, growing up in a culture where guns are common (military family, hunting, etc.) be damned: You do not put a quick-acting and irreversible means of causing death within easy reach of a person who says, “I can’t have guns around; it makes me feel unsafe.” You get to set your own personal risk tolerance, and you get a say in whether deadly weapons come into your home, and one thing that your partner could do to make you feel instantly safer about the prospect of gun ownership in general is to actually listen to you and believe you about the part that specifically affects you.” #764: Darth Vader + Guns = Bad – Captain Awkward
“The truth is, removing toxicity from any area of your life is a process. There is a certain amount of mourning that goes into cutting ties with someone. It’s almost as if the person has died, except you have to resist the urge to resurrect her because that option is still there.” Dealing with Toxic Relationships & Finding Emotional Freedom – Tiny Buddha
“Because I’ve been focusing only on “what will they think?” and not at all on “what would I like?”
There’s that phrase. ‘Carry yourself with the confidence of a mediocre white man‘. I think that that’s what that’s about. The mediocre white man isn’t spending his time thinking about what everyone else in the world thinks of him and what he wants. He’s just doing his thing. It doesn’t matter that he’s mediocre. He couldn’t care less.
And of course, the world responds well to a mediocre white man doing his thing, so he doesn’t have to develop the kind of second-guessing that the rest of us do.
But I think that that’s how to learn to do that. How to learn to carry yourself like a mediocre white man. When your brain keeps asking you “what will they think of me?”, change the question to “what do I want? What am I excited about? What’s interesting to me? What can I get to do?”
I mean, it won’t change the outside world. But feck that. Inside is every bit as important.” Fuck Imposter Syndrome – Consider the Tea Cosy
21 Tips to Release Self-Neglect and Love Yourself in Action – Tiny Buddha
“As a psychiatrist and empath when I took a close look at the history of my highly sensitive patients I discovered that they didn’t have the defenses that others have to screen things out. Knowing this significantly changed their treatment. My job became teaching them to center and protect themselves, set healthy boundaries, and let go of the energy they picked up from others.” Strategies for Empaths to Stop Absorbing Other People’s Symptoms – Elephant Journal
Chronic Illness & Pain
Anatomy of a Migraine – Health Central
“I like the idea of using the word “movement”. Even the word “stretching” sounds too much like a fitness activity for me. Let’s face it, I fully agree that it is a good idea to do some sort of activity that will help reduce the amount of muscle wasting and potential bone loss. Yet throwing the word “exercise” into the title of an ME article often means that the wrong impression is given.” ME Awareness – Why NOT Exercise? – Just ME
CFS / ME & Electrosensitivity Pain – Soldiering On! – Get Up and Go Guru
“However, even if an illness is invisible to others, it is constantly present to the person living with it. One of the main challenges of living with a chronic condition is striking a balance between protecting your privacy and wanting others to acknowledge how your diagnosis and symptoms impact what and how much you can do on any given day.” “But You Don’t Look Sick” – Living With a Chronic Invisible Illness – Adios Barbie
Non-AIP Ingredients in Food, Body Products and Household Items – Autoimmune Paleo
“I‘m tired too. It’s a seemingly innocent statement that induces a fit of internal rage and frustration in those that are suffering from chronic fatigue. Unfortunately, these three words convey a complete and utter lack of understanding of the severity of chronic fatigue and the impact that it has on the lives of those who suffer from it. It’s a statement that serves to do nothing but trivialise someone’s struggle.
Chronic fatigue is not just feeling tired. We would give anything to feel a normal level of tired. Being tired is considered a “good day” for someone suffering from chronic fatigue. So if we open up to you and tell you about our struggles please, for goodness sake, don’t reply with the words “I’m tired too”. You may risk physical injury if you do (I kid of course… sort of).” Here’s What Chronic Fatigue Really Feels Like – February Stars
21 Natural Solutions for Fibromyalgia – Dr Jockers
Surprising Benefits of Natural Childbirth – Mama Natural
“When you have a painful and stubborn problem, the troubleshooting recipe is to learn as much as you can about the treatment options, and then start experimenting, working your way from the cheaper, easier, safer, more reasonable options to the more expensive, awkward, risky, kooky options. And skip the worst!
Browse the tips below to plan your approach to most healing and rehabilitation challenges, especially athletic injuries, overuse syndromes, muscular pain, joint pain, chronic pain, and repetitive strain syndromes. Almost every tip includes links to (way) more detailed articles and tutorials.” Pain and Injury Survival Tips – Pain Science
Consumers Are Embracing Full Fat Foods – The New York Times
“Look, I’m a partisan in all this, and I have my biases. Nevertheless, I argue that it’s incumbent upon science journalists in high profile publications like the Wall Street Journal, The New York Times and The Atlantic to at the very least cite the potential biases in the experts they quote. Readers deserve to know the underlying motivations of those who claim expertise in this field. If someone has been paid $3500/hour to defend the sugar content in yogurt, that person should not be represented as an unbiased expert on the science of dietary sugar. Period. Full stop.
I really don’t think that’s too much to ask.” Should the Media Consider Dr. Katz an Objective Expert on Nutrition? – Escape from Caloriegate
Can Vegetarians Eat the Bulletproof Diet – Bulletproof Executive
A Beginner’s Guide to Drinking Better Green Tea – Serious Eats
“Knowing the stories behind the people who make the things you love is inspiring. It gives more meaning to every object you use, and adds more appreciation to everything you do. Even something as simple as a paperclip connects and brings together miners, manufacturers, inventors, engineers, marketers, executives, and truck drivers. A product as storied and complex as tea is no exception. Let’s take a moment to get to know who brings us our daily cup, and in the process understand how labor contributes to what we pay.” Transparency in the Tea Industry: The Cost of Labor – Verdant Tea
Olive Oil Redemption: Yes, It’s a Great Cooking Oil – The Paleo Mom
“From the intricacy of Japanese tea ceremonies to the ornateness of holiday dinners, food related customs hold big sway in every culture. They all reflect in some way an element of that culture’s values and common story—whether long inherited or deliberately chosen. While some of our rituals can be traced to particular religious traditions, others are more secularly instituted, family oriented or even individually constructed. Those grander social customs might evoke more conscious nostalgia, but science suggests even the small practices we enact around our eating can have surprising results.” The Power of Food Rituals – Mark’s Daily Apple
How to Make Scented Vinegar – Clean Mama
Gingerbread Cut-Outs (Revisited) – The Paleo Mom
Poached Salmon with Leek & Fennel Soup – petra8paleo
AIP Green Onion-Sage Pork Meatballs & Cranberry-Fig Dipping Sauce – Paleo Cajun Lady
Allergy Free Chai Tea Muffins – Hybrid Rasta Mama
Eggs in Hash Brown Nests – Paleo Hacks
Eggnog Latte Recipe – Mommypotamus