Link Love (2016-04-16)
Pay attention to ME Mummy!
The Art of the Meaningful Apology – Becoming Who You Are
“With the Internet and social media and the explosion of books there is SO MUCH content. This means consumers are overwhelmed with choices. Reviews help writers sell books because if readers see a book with no reviews or five reviews versus a similar title with thirty reviews? Who will they choose? Additionally writers gain access to promotional tools like Bookbub, but can ONLY do this with a minimum number of reviews.
Instead of sending me an e-mail about how much my book changed your life? Put it on Amazon and change MINE!
Readers are essential to our success beyond just the sale. If you love our books, your promotion means a thousand times more than any ad I could pay for. Ads and marketing don’t sell books. Never did and never will. Only thing that sells books is word of mouth.” The Ugly Truth of Publishing & How BEST to Support Writers – Kristen Lamb’s Blog
5 Ways to Improve Your Communication Skills – Dr NerdLove
“The sick must suffer like Christ on the cross
At the time of her death, Mother Teresa had opened 517 missions welcoming the poor and sick in more than 100 countries. The missions have been described as “homes for the dying” by doctors visiting several of these establishments in Calcutta. Two-thirds of the people coming to these missions hoped to a find a doctor to treat them, while the other third lay dying without receiving appropriate care. The doctors observed a significant lack of hygiene, even unfit conditions, as well as a shortage of actual care, inadequate food, and no painkillers. The problem is not a lack of money—the Foundation created by Mother Teresa has raised hundreds of millions of dollars—but rather a particular conception of suffering and death: “There is something beautiful in seeing the poor accept their lot, to suffer it like Christ’s Passion. The world gains much from their suffering,” was her reply to criticism, cites the journalist Christopher Hitchens. Nevertheless, when Mother Teresa required palliative care, she received it in a modern American hospital.” Mother Teresa: anything but a saint… – UdeMNouvelles
One Million Moms Declares War on Children of Gay Parents – Love, Joy, Feminism
“And let’s be clear: This week’s prominent “prayer shamers” aren’t really against prayer. They’re against platitudes. The problem is when “thoughts and prayers” are the only response to a public event that calls for political action. It’s hard to imagine that even the most dedicated atheist objects to Ted Cruz kneeling by his bed at night to pray for the victims of yesterday’s shooting. What Cruz chooses to do in his bedroom is his own business. The issue is that politicians like him continue to offer thoughts and prayers and nothing else: no assault weapons ban, no universal background checks, no federal gun registry.” Prayer-shaming isn’t about attacking prayer. It’s about calling out empty platitudes. – Slate
“The originators and adherents of #GiveYourMoneyToWomen didn’t just suggest that women should get paid for existing, although yeah that too if you’re buying. Rather, women should get paid for all the work they typically do for free – all the affirmation, forbearance, consultation, pacifying, guidance, tutorial, and weathering abuse that we spend energy on every single day. Imagine a menu of emotional labor: Acknowledge your thirsty posturing, $50. Pretend to find you fascinating, $100. Soothe your ego so you don’t get angry, $150. Smile hollowly while you make a worse version of their joke, $200. Explain 101-level feminism to you like you’re five years old, $300. Listen to your rant about “bitches,” $infinity.” “Where’s My Cut?” On Unpaid Emotional Labor – The Toast
“The message that we consistently send out is that in order to achieve any kind of significant career goals, girls need to adopt traits that are typically associated with masculinity.” Why We Need to Stop Devaluing Feminity – Role / Reboot
“How about this, cis and socially-acceptably-gender-conforming people: instead of putting trans people at risk in bathrooms and other binary-gendered spaces, be part of the solution. Be a bathroom buddy. Grab an I’ll Go With You button and advertise that you’re not a danger in those spaces. Let your trans/GNC friends know you’ll accompany them to gendered spaces if they need it and back them up when they get hassled. And above all, look into your own fears. Figure out who you are afraid of and why. Work out ways to mitigate the danger you’re in. But while you do that, make sure you’re not creating danger for others. It’s hard work. But I can’t see any other way to get out of this.” Trans Women Are Not The Enemy, They Just Gotta Pee: responding to Cork Feminista’s Ale Soares – Consider the Tea Cosy
The Problem with Gendering Kids’ Halloween Costumes Is Othering, Not Sexualizing – Love, Joy, Feminism
“Pulse? Check. Am I a woman? Well, I say I am, so . . . Yes.
That’s it. That’s all that is required to prove that I’m “real.” So there ya have it. I have a pulse, so I’m real, and I say I’m a woman, so I’m a woman. Ergo, I am a real woman. HOWEVAAAAA . . . the lovely interwebs think otherwise. Oh those damn interwebs, always tryin’ to tear a girl down. Let’s take a look at all the ways WE are NOT real women. Hold on to your panties ladies, this is gonna be good!” Ain’t I A Real Woman? – Ravishly
Beauty & Body Image
Style as Self-care – Already Pretty
“In 2009, however, she left haute fashion behind and launched IZ Adaptive, making clothes for people who have disabilities but who’d rather not abandon their sartorial identity. Cutting out the back of a biker jacket makes it easier to spend hours sitting in a chair, for example. She designed a funnel neck wool coat that’s longer in the front than in the back for the same reason. Camilleri’s pants have big voluminous bottoms that sag like deflated balloons when the pants are on a hanger. “It looks really big, but it’s not—a sitting person’s bum fills this out,” she says, tugging on the extra fabric.” These clothes are designed to change with us as we age – Quartz
Embrace your grey: Society’s double-standard for aging men and women – About-Face
“I really believe this is one of the greatest gifts we can give to each other in our partnerships–-the gift of being seen and understood.” How to Listen to My Wife – Jayson Gaddis
“Being in love with someone doesn’t mean you should expect that they’ll be able to read your mind, you can’t get angry at someone for not being able to understand why you’re acting the way you are. You have to communicate; you have to talk about it.
So, self-awareness and communication are so very important in a relationship. You have to know what kind of energies you’re illuminating, so that you can discuss it with your partner appropriately. Telling them you are sad or stressed out and explaining why will go a long way. They won’t internalize your actions, and maybe they’ll be a little more understanding and sympathetic. If you lash out without communicating, you’re going to create a hostile environment and resentment within the person you love the most.” Expect a Partner, Not a Mind Reader – Hasty Words
How to Stay Friends After the Breakup – Dr NerdLove
The Art Of Saying “No” – Manage Your Stress and Find Your Joy – Paleo Cajun Lady
“Are you practicing worry or blame?” she continued. “Perhaps you’re practicing patience and love. Notice what you’re practicing and know that you become what you practice. What you practice is what you live.” What Are You Practicing – Self-Judgment or Self-Compassion? – Tiny Buddha
Self-Acceptance Is Activism: A Conversation with Jessamyn Stanley – Yoga International
Chronic Illness & Pain
CFS & Pregnancy Tips – Get Up and Go Guru
“Instead of giving up, I’ve taken a step back and re-evaluated where I’m at. I believe the problem lies in the fact that I am trying to run before I can walk (figuratively speaking, I should add!). I think I’ve been putting too much pressure on myself because I have been holding onto the hope of returning to work. The stress associated with all of that is clearly not helping my situation either, it has to be said.
This pressure (which is all self-imposed I must say) has made me try to progress too quickly and this therefore results in crashes. My body simply reaches the point where it cannot do what I am asking of it. The good news, however, is that I now know how to handle flare ups and what would previously have taken weeks of recovery, is now taking me 3-4 days. So overall things are going in the right direction.
The problem lies with the fact that as soon as I recover, I try to move forward again at the same pace.” Fibromyalgia: Re-evaluating Pacing – February Stars
Bladder Retraining – Interstitial Cystitis Association
“Learn about this chronic condition and what can be done to relieve the symptoms of pain, pressure, and frequent urination.” Understanding Interstitial Cystitis – Bladder Health Center
Living with RA: 10 Tips for Building & Maintaining Energy – Health Central
Home Remedies for Cold Sores that Actually Work – Holistic Squid
Getting Freya was definitely one of the best things I have ever done: Why a Dog Might Be Your Best Health Investment – Humans Are Not Broken
18 Ways to Beat Eczema, Acne and Psoriasis – Dr Jockers
“There’s a big difference between developing flexibility, which would be in your muscles, and laxity, which occurs when your ligaments are no longer intact. As Esther points out, the danger of repeatedly rounding your back in one spot is that it creates ligament laxity. You really do not want your back to be curved. You want to maintain a straight spine with strong ligaments.” Gokhale Method: Banish Pain by Relearning Proper Posture – Mercola
“I think there is something inherently soothing to the nervous system about handwork, especially once one has a sufficient level of skill.” Stress Management – Petra8Paleo
“Some science: As the body’s only form of transparent tissue, the cornea gets its oxygen solely from the air. That means that when you put in contact lenses, the oxygen supply lessens a bit, and when you close your eyes, the supply lessens more. When you combine the two, the oxygen can be critically reduced, says Kerry Assil, M.D., an eye surgeon at the Assil Eye Institute in Los Angeles.
Without oxygen, the cornea swells up—not a cartoonish, popping-out-of-your-head amount, but enough so that gaps appear between the eye’s surface cells, where bacteria can sneak in. This bacteria may increase your risk of eye infection by nearly sevenfold, says Thomas Steinemann, M.D., a clinical spokesperson for the American Academy of Ophthalmology. And because the eye doesn’t have the body’s same immune system protection, things can turn bad fast.” Sleeping With Contacts and What It Does to Your Eyes – Greatist
6 Natural Treatments for Tendonitis – Dr Axe
Egg-Free, Tomato-Free (Hidden Liver) Paleo Meatloaf – The Paleo Mom
Peppermint Snowball Cookies (AIP/Paleo) – Sweet Potatoes and Social Change
Primal Salmon Spread with Nori Chips – Mark’s Daily Apple
Superfood Gingerbread Latte Recipe – Wellness Mama
Homemade Tandoori Masala Spice Mix – Chris Kresser
Sweet Potato Paratha (AIP, Paleo) – Adventures in Partaking